First off I'll start by clearing the confusion. This in not Santa. Santa has black gloves. This is Dale. He looks great in red and everybody loves him, mostly the ladies. Those are both statements of fact and not opinion. There is also a certain etiquette that accompanies Dale. He prefers to be saluted, it's the least you could for someone who always salutes you. The proper Dale salute also includes a belt grab (see image 1).Dale and I first met in Orlando at a junk swap. Instantly my standard of living was improved. We hung out, went to pool parties, had animal pancakes and other such great fun. The sad part came in April when I returned home to Idaho and Dale stayed in Orlando to live it up and have adventures of his own. Finally, 7 months later and thanks to a pleasant visit from our friend Jared Soloman, Dale and I are once again kickin it. Yo.
The only problem is, it's December. Which means a lot of people have been disrespecting Dale a lot lately. It took a while but my roommates no longer call him Santa, at least not in front of me. But anytime someone comes to the door or comes over to visit we get asked, "whose Santa is that?" "Pshhhh!!! Not Santa. Dale. And he's his own." That's what I say. Anyway, if you do happen to stop by this Christmas season, or ever for that matter, please don't offend my friend as I will try not to offend you and yours.
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